There is a short story by the illustrious(ish) Mr. King called “Everything’s Eventual.” Leaving aside the story itself — which is fantastic, but not particularly relevant here — that is kind of how I feel this week. I’ll start work on the new job… eventually. My tomato blossoms will set fruit… eventually. Connor will finish potty training… eventually. This month’s week o’fun will get here… eventually. Mer will post my LBtC guest post… eventually (ahem). I will buckle down and do some serious work at Schizodigestive… eventually. On and on it goes.
I’m having trouble updating this site, because the same things are not-happening every single day. If it feels this repetitive on my end, I can only imagine what y’all think — I mean, most of you could probably write these entries for me. “Hey, I’m still unemployed and/or nebulously employed! My garden is pretty! Connor is cute and he said something witty! Some people make me angry because I have a huge superiority complex! Now I will make a meta-comment about how boring and/or repetitive I am and end this entry with an unsatisfying conclusion!” It’s a wonderful formula, really, but sometimes I am disenchanted with the entire idea of text in a box.
Life is okay, right now. I am still kind of worried about our financial situation, but I think that will go away once I start work on the new job. I am upset about the tomato-salmonella thing and very anxious for my plants to start making fruit. I am free-floating through the week, waiting to have solid, constructive things to do. This is a very boring process. Next week I will rampage through the apartment on a pre-guests cleaning spree, start some real work, do some cooking so I have something for the food blog… and maybe I’ll write a serious update then. In the meantime, I have a question for you: Is it more heroic to make a hard, morally poisonous choice and figure out how to live with the consequences, or more heroic to sacrifice yourself rather than your morals — in which case you die, and do not have to live with any consequences? Please discuss. My brain is all tangled.