variations on a theme: BLURGH.


I've been going to the gym a lot lately. Yeah, why don't you all just take a moment with that?

… Okay, we're back. So, gym. I've been going because I find it nearly impossible to eat the way I should if I want to lose this crappy weight and be a little more healthy. I'm doing better, don't get me wrong — but I'm just not doing well enough. Diet alone no longer works for me, in large part because I seem to have completely melted the part of my brain that can say no to tasty things. It's a curse.

Basically, it's a curse that means I need to get myself moving more. If I don't want to starve myself/give up all carbs forever/consume massive amounts of diet pills, I need to exercise. I used to be pretty good at exercise; I've always been kind of naturally athletic and… well, there's the willpower thing. I've always been the absolute queen of making myself do unpleasant things for some inane “greater good.”

Not so much anymore. I have to practically kill myself to make myself get into the gym. I've been doing it, but damn, it's hard. I'm not even doing much — I started out on the exercise bikes because, you know, lazy. I've since moved up to a whopping seven minutes on the elliptical trainer (… I know), but it's still not much. I want to weight-train, but I swear by all that is holy that every single time I am at the gym, the weight room is being used for a class. It's driving me nuts, and it's making my workouts into laze-outs. (Shut up about the term; this is my journal and I can make things up if I want to.)

God, there's a lot of defensive flanneling here. Let's cut to the chase.

I'm really out of shape. Really, really out of shape, to the point that I had to work up to that seven minutes on the elliptical trainer. Every day, I tell myself that the elliptical is a “warm-up,” stay on it for as long as I can manage, and then head for the weight room… which I can't use, because of the class and the mean teachers and the blah blah blah.

I'm looking at something now that I've never, ever done before: running. Not as in “away” or “for my life,” but running for exercise. Let me make it clear to y'all that I hate running. Haaaaate. I would almost rather become some 500-pound monstrosity of immobility and stretchmarks than run. Almost.

Since the machine room is seemingly the only thing that's ever open at my gym, I need something that will use… machines. The elliptical trainer is great and I want to keep going with it, but I need something else. I need something with higher intensity, more fat-burning potential, and better cardiovascular benefits. In short, I need to get my ass on the treadmill, so I'm going to run. To be specific, I'm going to run following the Couch to 5k plan, and then try to push myself up to 5-mile runs three times a week.

Why am I blathering about it in a public forum, you ask? Because I need to be held accountable. I need somewhere to report my progress (or lack thereof — see above, re: hate), and I'm kind of hoping to get at least one running buddy out of this. If any of you fitness nuts or three-toed sloths want to start the program with me, that would be awesome. If not, I still need to blather about it, and maybe receive the occasional scolding. It's open season on lazy me over here, guys.

I'm starting tomorrow; I'll let you know how it goes.

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